Crowley in Wonderland
by yamimitsukai
Summary: Crowley takes a visit into Wonderland and tries to hold on to the little bits of sanity that he has left. Superwholock in a way. Characters show up. Well, not in a way because it kind of is. Meh, explanations.


**((Let's see if I can make this as crazy as possible. This should be in my drabble story...but its kind of long and I figured, might as well make it a one shot.))**

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**So the prompt was Drink Me and I got it from Rose Tyler. Instead of doing the sane and rational thing though, I decided to go Wonderland Insane! What is wrong with me? **

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Crowley had been reading a book when he spotted one of his hellhound puppies running, towards the end of the property. Even if no one else could see the pup, Crowley wasn't about to take the chance that the puppy would stop right in the middle of the highway and get run over by an unsuspecting driver. Crowley followed Tempo (one of the other demons had named it before giving him to Crowley) at a leisurely pace, watching the hellhound turn away from the road and into a forest that Crowley didn't remember being there before. Well, no time like the present to check it out.

Tempo, after nearly ten minutes of wandering deeper into the mysterious forest, finally stopped in front of a tree that had a hole at the bottom and started digging at it. The hole didn't seem to grow any larger. Crowley frowned and walked up beside the dog, lightly pushing him to the side to peer down the hole.

All of a sudden he felt something strongly push him and he somehow fit through the hole. Turning, he saw Tempo grin in a way that should not have been possible on any dog's face. He turned again, trying to spot the ground to brace himself for impact, but he couldn't see anything.

He just kept falling and falling and he thought that he was falling down into the deepest level of hell for whatever reason. Crowley tried flying back up but nothing happened. He was completely fucked.

It seemed like years later when he finally reached the bottom. And he didn't crash, like he expected to. Instead he gracefully landed on the floor, into a room that didn't seem to have any doors.

"Well, isn't this grand." He muttered, glancing around the room. It was ornately decorated, with an expensive and tacky looking furniture, wall decorations, and a chandelier that wasn't attached to any ceiling. It was official. He had finally managed to crack and was now the realm of insanity. Maybe he would find Cas here.

He went to go sit down on the chair that was placed next to the table and spotted a bottle sitting on the glass with a note attached.

"Drink me." He read the note aloud. Glaring at the liquid inside of the bottle, which was a bright pink color, he placed it back on the table and crossed his arms across his chest. "There is absolutely no bloody way that I'm even touching that."

"You should!" A familiar voice, if a bit high pitched and squeaky, suddenly made itself known.

"Rose?" Crowley asked, completely confused as a rather large door mouse ran across the table to stop right in front of him.

"Hi Crowley!" She squeaked. Crowley stared. This was one screwed up insanity trip.

"Since when were you a door mouse?"

"I've always been a door mouse! Why are you being so mean today? You need to drink that potion and become normal again." Rose the door mouse placed her tiny paws on her hips. "Now drink up!"

"Right…I'm clearly in a dream that my now completely mental subconscious is playing for me. I am not drinking that thing. I don't even know what it does or why I should be drinking it."

"Because you'll shrink down to size, dummy! And then you can go to the door and go to your home and have tea parties and cake and play cricket with Queen like you always do!" The little mouse sounded so earnest, it sickened Crowley.

"Not going to happen, sweetheart. I'm not taking anything that shrinks me. I don't want to go through that door. All I want, is a way to fly back up that way," he pointed up the tunnel, "so I can get back to my dogs and book."

"NO! YOU NEED TO DRINK IT!" Rose's voice became amplified, hurting his ears.

"I am not drinking it!" he stood up from the table, putting some distance between himself and the angry rodent.

"DRINK IT!"

"NO!" Crowley set the table on fire, the door mouse screeching as loud as its lungs could as it burned along with the stupid drink and the table. He tried to fly out again, but his wings refused to work.

"Bollocks."

There was an angry roar from the flames, and black shapeless smog shot out from the flames towards Crowley. He dodged it, throwing more fire, since it was apparently his only defense. There were no weapons he could use lying around.

He heard chattering coming from all around him and saw the shadows of many more beings closing around him, all with red eyes and with distinctive traits to distinguish them. Crowley saw a walrus and some human shape with a saw, as well as some fat person holding what looked like a bat. There was also a hare and some sort of bird, though not one he had ever seen before.

Crowley felt a bead of sweat roll down his neck as the circle grew smaller, the chattering growing louder and more frantic, but he couldn't understand a single word of what was being said.

He started throwing fire like a madman, which he probably was at this point, and the shadows alternated between moving closer and screeching away. He didn't know how long he fought, spinning constantly, trying to move around in the limited circle range that he had. Whatever he did though, it was no use. The shadows started coming closer, each pulling out vials of the potion, all with the tag saying DRINK ME. As one, they were all uncorked and Crowley grew more desperate in his attacks. Whatever it was that these things wanted him to drink, could not be good. He clenched his mouth shut.

It wasn't long until his fire started to sizzle out. He had used up all of his power and now he staggered from exhaustion. But the shadows still came and now Crowley could finally understand their words.

"Drink it, he needs to drink it. Wonderland needs the balance. Everything must proceed as before." There was more, but Crowley couldn't hear anymore as the shadows finally covered him whole and his vision was completely obscured by black.

Crowley opened his eyes with a gasp and found himself back outside sitting with his book in hand. He looked around and saw all of the hellhounds playing a few feet away, Tempo as well. He shook his head, it was just a hellish nightmare dream. He turned the page of his book, and stared in shock as a vial sat on the pages, just like it belonged there, with a giant DRINK ME attached to it.

He slammed the book shut and quickly stood up. It was time to head back inside and get a drink that he would enjoy. He whistled for the dogs to follow and he watched as they all marched obediently towards the house. Tempo did stop for a moment in front of him and Crowley would never admit that the grin he had seen adorn Tempo's face in his dream was identical now.

"Get." He muttered, swatting the dog who immediately ran to catch up with the rest of the pack. Crowley ran a shaking hand across his face, trying his best to forget everything. Setting the book on the ground, he snapped his fingers to get a fire started. Nothing. He was out of juice. Paling, Crowley fumbled for his lighter, which he always kept on hand and burned the book. Reading Alice in Wonderland had not been his smartest move. Maybe he really was loosing his mind.

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**Its not too much to ask for some reviews is it? I mean, I want to improve as a writer as to do that I need feedback, right? *Shameless poor manipulation* **


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